Raise Your Hand if You Stepped in Shit Today!

I stepped in chihuahua poop today.
How was your day?

Yep. It was still warm and it kind of stuck to my sock. So, my chihuahua's name has gone from Forrest, to Moron, to a lower still Lamont (Big Dummy.) It could have been worse, I guess. I mean if it were a sombody's poop instead of a dumb dog's poop I would have hated that more. Also a big pile of poop would be way worse than a teeny tiny little chihuahua turd. So really, it wasn't so bad. It seems a fitting metaphor for my day. It just wasn't a huge pile o' poop kind of day. It was just a teeny tiny turd kind of day.


Scale:
Somebody's Poop - 10 ("O00H FUUUUCK NOOOOO!")
Great Dane Poop - 9 ("FUCK!")
Laborador Poop - 8 ("Fuckin' gross!")
Cocker Spaniel Poop - 6 ("Gross!")
Poodle Poop - 4 ("OH NO!")
Chihuahua Poop - 2 ("Oh man!")
Dried Turd - 1 ("Oh thank God!")

I think a dried turd is just the threat of what a bad day it could have been. In fact, it could be a universal symbol of gratitude. When you step on a dried turd, you are immediately grateful as in, "Oh thank God it wasn't warm and squishy." That Zen stuff is really helping me find clarity on so many levels!

Okay, well enough talkin' shit...(I couldn't help it)

I am going to go meditate.